To listen to the blog post “How Single Moms Date ~ 7 MUST FOLLOW Single Mom Dating Rules” click the play button down below.
This post will tell you how single moms date. If you are a dating single mom then you want to avoid these single mom dating problems and mistakes that oh so many single moms make. Dating as a single mom is different than just dating as a single woman. Because you have kids and like it or not you have to take them into consideration when you go forward in your dating life.
Single mom dating rules to remember is that you just can’t date around recklessly and do whatever you want without any thought about the family you have at home. So I am here to help you from single mom to single mom, and help you avoid these common single mom problems so that you can have a successful dating life. I want all of my single moms to have the most enjoyable and drama free dating life as possible. Also, check out my video below on what to look for in a man and a future husband (if that is your goal). And don’t forget to subscribe to my YouTube channel by clicking here.
1. Single Mom Dating Problems How Single Moms Date ~ Being Messy On a Date
The first single mom dating rules that I have also written about this in my common mistakes that people make on the first date blog (which you can read here). Being messy on a date can come in many forms. Being messy can include getting too drunk on a date leading you into taking the man home and having him with you in front of your children. Being messy can be having a one night stand and forgetting to come home causing your baby sitter to spend the night and wondering where the heck you are.
- Being too sexually suggestive in the restaurant to the point of vulgarity.
- Ordering for your children on the first date (when they are not there) so you can bring home a doggy bag for them and asking your date to pay.
- Crying about what a hard life you have, asking him for money, and otherwise being a hot mess.
- Trashing your ex husband, ex boyfriend, or your children’s father.
As a woman you should always act classy. And if you do not know how to do that then read my blog oh how to act classy. Do not act and or curse like you have no home training. You are someone’s mother, so you get less slack to be messy. Ideally you should be more mature since you have children, so make sure you behave like that. Remember you are somebody’s mama, so you do not get a pass to act like a college sorority girl on a date. Also check out my video down below for more tips on how to act on a date.
2. How Single Moms Date & Single Mom Dating Rules~ Dressing TOO much Like A Mom
The second of the single mom dating rules is that you do not have to act and dress like an OLD MAID. But you should not be wearing clothing that shows any parts of your vagina, or any attire that would give anyone reason to believe you are a prostitute. Remember it is a date and you want to look desirable YES but not go overboard or worse underboard .
Even though you have children, you do not want to show up to the date in a 15 year old pair of mom jeans and a shirt that you have not washed in the past 2 weeks. Really put some effort into your appearance when you go out on a date. Balance attractive, classy, and motherhood.
If you are just lost in the fashion department then you are in luck, I have something free that you are going to FREAKIN LOVE. YES LOVE. It is my 100% free ebook, the Sophie-sticated Mom Stylish, Chic, & Modern Women’s Year-Round Capsule Wardrobe Plan. Be frugal (cause as a single mom you may be on a budget. I get it), relatively modest, chic, stylish, and yes there are outfits for dates specifically. Just click here to get it. Remember fashion foward mom. Not busted or too revelating mom. Look attractive to your date YES but it is a fine balance.
3. How Single Moms Date & Single Mom Dating Problems ~ Don’t Develop Single Mom Syndrome
I have written on single mom syndrome blog for all of those who do not know what it is you can click here to read. BUT in short, single mom syndrome is when you get so caught up in your man that you abandon your children to spend more time with your man. You chose to have children and therefore you have a responsibility to them. You cannot go out with your man 7 nights and/or days out of the week.
Where are your kids? Who is picking them up from school? And who is helping them with their homework? If you say the babysitter then that is the wrong answer. If you say their father, then sure that is his SOME of his responsibility just like it is SOME of yours. You are STILL their mother. Do not let a man make you forget that. It will cause your kids to resent you. Even when the man is gone, your kids will still be your kids. So do not just forget mom duties because you want to give more attention to your man.
That also means that when you go out on a date you need to end the date at an appropriate time (also check out my blog on where to meet men as a single mom to find a balance). It is not good to stay out with your date until 5am and you have to get your children up for school at 6am. Low key the guy is judging you for being a bad mom even if you are with him. In his head he is thinking her kids her problem, even if he thinks that you abandoning them is wrong. And if he does not understand that what you are doing is inappropriate then he does not understand your priorities, and you should not be with him anyway.
4. Single Mom Dating Rules & Single Mom Dating Problems ~ Introducing Him To Your Kids Too Soon
I have a blog on when to introduce your man to your children which you can read here. I know sometimes you can think that just because you are dating someone you want your kids to meet him right away so that you can multitask being a mom and dating. Do not do that, every man that you date does not need to meet your children. You need to be VERY particular about who you bring into your home and be sure that you plan on having him around long term. Otherwise, your home becomes a revolving door. Also, check out my blog and my video on when to introduce your kids to your boyfriend by clicking here.
5. How Single Moms Date & Single Mom Dating Rules ~ Trying To Make Him Your Children’s Father
Some single mothers, are like myself, and their child’s father is not involved at all. Either way you go, when you date it is not the time to MAKE a man be a dad to your child. As time progresses and you get more serious, then sure that is a different story if you are getting married because that is their role. But as soon as you date a man, trying to get your child to call the man dad, or force him to play father figure to your child is not ready is not a good idea.
It can make the child feel uncomfortable because you are trying to shove this random man down their throat and the man uncomfortable because he feels pressured to fill a role he may not be ready for. Also check out my video down below for more mistakes single moms make that can run men away.
6. Single Mom Dating Problems & Single Mom Dating Rules ~ Spilling Too Much Tea
No matter how the situation ended with your children’s father, the man you are dating does not need to know every detail. As things progress into a relationship you will open up about certain things. But the man you are dating does not need to know what a cold hearted bastard your ex is and you hope that he gets killed in a drive by shooting. That type of talk makes you sound crazy not like a woman he wants to date.
A date is supposed to be fun not a therapy session or a chance to bash your ex or talk about how you need a new prince to save you and the man that you are dating is it! That spells crazy, desperation, and neediness.
7. Single Mom Dating Problems & How Single Moms Date ~ No Casual Sex
I do not care if you are a mother and have had sex before and I do not care if a man is pressuring you to have sex because you have kids. (Click here to read my blog on maintaining celibacy as a single mom). In the end it is YOUR body, you can do what you want with it, therefore do not feel pressured to have sex with a man. Even if you want to have sex with a man while dating, do not do it. As a single mom you have to be careful about the perception you put out. Even if you are dating a man for a while, having your man over there while you bump and grind while your children are sleeping is not a good look.
If you are asking me then I feel like celibacy is the answer. Which I have a video below on. If he wants to cow (aka your vagina) then he needs to buy it (aka marry you). You should not want to be in a position to just want to go and sleep around with every man that you date.
As a single mom dating you have to remember that you are making decisions for yourself and your children, so you have to be more particular on who you date and how you come across during date. But hopefully with these tips you will not continue to make these single mom dating mistakes.
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Did you know that I have a book specifically for single moms? To know more about my No Nonsense Single Mom’s Devotional then click here. Also click here or the picture below to Join my email list Sophie-stication Nation and I will send you the first few chapters for free.