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As a single Christian woman purposeful singleness is something that I highly encourage. So many women are doing their singleness journey the WRONG WAY. First I want to give you some insight on how to better enjoy your life as a single Christian woman and then give you 5 bloggers who actually did it and most of which got married.
Not because they held up their life waiting for a man but because they enjoyed their life and the man came to them.
So how many of you are waiting for Mr. Right to come knocking on your door, be a prince charming, and rescue you from your present situation. Which is the curse of being single?
As a result, you end up wasting your single life. Not doing anything much, not achieving anything much, not becoming anything much, and not thinking about anything much. Instead, your single life is spent wondering when you are going to get married.
If you want the reality of what I am talking about watch the video below on how to actively wait as a single woman. Yes, you may be waiting for your man but you should not be sitting still doing nothing. And don’t forget to subscribe to my channel by clicking here.
I am not against relationships BUT I am all for purposeful singleness and feel that is what every single Christian woman should be doing. In case you do not know what purposeful singleness means I am going to give you my quick working definition.
Purposeful singleness definition
The definition of purposeful singleness is that you are being intentional about your single life. It means that you are working on yourself, your personal development, your relationship with God, and you are becoming a better woman for God, yourself, and your future partner.
Why you should do it as a Single Christian Woman?
My question to you would be why not? I think that whatever you do in life you should be intentional about it. Meaning that your life needs to be lived on purpose. Who just stumbles into a wonderful life that they always dreamed of by accident? NO ONE.
And why should you just have a sucky life with the expectation that one day prince charming is going to come and rescue you from it?
That whole attitude has a sense of entitlement to it. That you expect your life to be complete only when someone else comes in and does it for you. But until then you just sit and do not do anything. That makes no sense.
Take the following Bible Verse:
And don’t be wishing you were someplace else or with someone else. Where you are right now is God’s place for you. Live and obey and love and believe right there. God, not your marital status, defines your life. 1 Corinthians 7:17
You were not placed on this Earth to JUST be someone’s wife. God gave you a purpose and He gave you a mission in life. Do not give that mission up just because you were wishing that you were married because your marital status does not define you.
God defines you and He wants to give you a lot, which is why you must be intentional, purposeful, and rejoice in your single season as a single Christian woman.
Instead of waiting until the day where you are going to meet the man of your dreams to be happy, understand that there is plenty of life and purpose to be lived before that moment. And you can still be happy doing it.
In case you still have no idea what I am talking about watch my video below on why you should chase the purpose and not the man and often times when you do the man will come.
I am not telling you that you desiring marriage is wrong. I am just telling you not to covet marriage to the point that this is all you become.
I believe that if you want to get married then you will, but sitting around and wasting the season that you are in now is not going to going to get you married any faster. I believe it does the opposite.
Take this Bible verse
An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord’s affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world” how she can please her husband. 1 Corinthians 7:34
As a single Christian woman, you may think that when you get married that all of your troubles will go away. That marriage is the end all and be all to end your singleness suffering.
When that is simply not true. Being married is hard and it brings its own unique set of problems. When you are single you are freer to do what you want to do with your life and you do not have to check in with anyone.
In fact, we can see clear stories in the Bible where married women had some issues so it is clear to say that it is not the end all be all. I am not going to go into it here but I do have a video on where I talk about it that you can watch below. And once again don’t forget to subscribe by clicking here.
Purposeful singleness and how do I do it?
As I mentioned in the last two points, God is the key to all of this. He is the one that created you and He is the one that gives you purpose. With that being said it is important to turn to Him to find out what you need to do to be doing in your state of single. As the above Bible verse said:
An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord’s affairs
I am not asking you to be a nun, but the Lord’s affairs can vary depending on who you are. What God wants me to do is not the same thing that God wants you to do, and that is not the same thing that He wants the neighbor down the street to do.
Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart. Psalm 37:4
- Talk to God and find out what He has for you (click here to read my blog on how to talk to the Holy Spirit).
- Pray for guidance and direction on what God wants you to do.
- Do what makes you happy. I personally feel that the desires were put in your heart for a reason and if God has put them there then that means that these are the things He wants you to pursue.
5 Single Christian Woman Bloggers Case Studies
It is a lot easier to show you better than I can tell you. Check out these wonderful women below that show purposeful singleness perfectly. I recently updated this blog as some of these women got married BUT they were all single when they started their single Christian woman blogs.
Single Christian Woman ~ #1 MYSELF (Dr. Sophia Reed)
You know I had to make this list yall. It is my blog, purposeful singleness is what I believe, so here I am. In case you do not know my single mother success story then you can click here to read it. I also encourage you to read my about me page.
I have been single for a long time. While I was single I have gotten a Master’s degree, a Ph.D., am a National Certified Counselor, AND started this blog that you are reading today.
I had a desire to help women and even though I HATED being single during these times and did not understand why God was keeping me single, I now understand that God wanted me to be about His business. He wanted to birth the purpose that He had for me, which is His primary concern.
It would have been really hard to do all this (Blog, degrees, and certifications) if I was with someone or was married. It would have been a distraction from what God really wanted me to do. I am not saying that God never wants me to be in a relationship, He just wanted it to come in the right time.
Like a lot of single women, I prolonged the process in some ways because I did not want to be purposeful in my singleness. I wanted to end my singleness causing me to put men as a priority over my purpose.
But once I gave in and started doing it God’s way I found more satisfaction and gratification than I would have if I were still sitting around not doing anything for myself, waiting for a man.
You can also watch my level up story to see how I mastered my life as a single Christian woman and if you want tips on how to level up your life then you can join my Patreon by clicking here.
Purposeful singleness ~ #2 Allyson Rowe
I encourage you to read her full bio which you can click here to read here. Allyson Rowe is a single Christian woman, former beauty queen, Christian speaker, professional makeup and skincare specialist, personal coach, and dedicated business woman.
In her purposeful singleness, she spent 3-month in isolation in which the Holy Spirit spoke to her and gave her the word, “Put the King on the Throne.” Since that time, she has stepped out boldly and dedicates her life to placing Jesus Christ above all else.
Having overcome self-image issues eating disorders, and a long term destructive relationship, God has raised her up with a fearless passion to see others released into full freedom in their God-ordained identities.
After a wonderful purposeful single season, Alyson became married and welcome her first child. After getting engaged to a man that she had known since high school, and getting married a few months after being engaged.
Teaching us all that God has a plan and when it is time for you to get married then it can happen in the blink of an eye.
Single Christian Woman ~ #3 Mandy Hale (Known as the Single Woman)
You can read Mandy’s bio right here. But to give you her purposeful singleness testimony some of the highlights consist of Mandy being a New York Times best-selling author and speaker.
Mandy actually goes by the name The Single Woman. Her goal is to inspire single women to live their best lives. She has been featured on Oprah, TD Jakes, Huffington Post, Forbes magazine, Glamour.com, Fox News, and The 700 Club, just to name a few. Check out her books below, a few of which are New York Time Best Sellers
Purposeful singleness ~ #4 and #5 Bethany Beal & Kristen Clark From the Blog Girl Defined
This is a Christian blog ran by two sisters and both are now married but they started the blog when they were single and gave the following advice in their blog The Hardest Thing about Being a Christian Single Which you can click here to read,
Have purpose and serve God.
I honestly believe that one of the best ways to overcome depression, sadness, unhappiness and worry during the single years, is to have an eternal purpose. Having purpose and serving God brings so much joy and fulfillment. It forces you to take your eyes off of yourself and what you don’t have, and puts them on Christ’s purposes and on other’s needs.
If I could recommend one thing for single Christian girls to do during this time it would be this: Have a God-centered vision and serve Him with your life.
Notice that all of these women not only practice purposeful singleness but all of them did the tips that I mentioned above. Also, if you read their bios, some women are in their 20’s, 30’s, and 40s, representing women of all ages.
Each woman turned to God first for a purpose and God gave them one. Each woman, including myself, wants to get married. But we are not letting marriage define us NOR are we allowing the fact that we are not in a relationship hold us back.
God has a purpose for all of us regardless and if you start living your singleness with a purpose, vision, and allowing God to lead the way then you will find out what that purpose is.
It is not sitting back on the couch in depression, wishing, hoping, and praying that God will take this singles curse away from you. It is time to get out, get up, and get something. It is time for you to stop allowing your singleness to limit your life but realize that it is a time to live your life.
And remember doing ALL of this helps you become a better person, a better woman, walk in your purpose, and it will help you be a better wife when the times comes. Live your single Christian woman life with a purpose.
If you enjoyed reading this post and you know other single ladies that would enjoy reading it, then I encourage you to share this post with them.