To listen to the following blog post “Who Is The Virtuous Woman & How To Become Her” over reading it just click the play button below.
When you read Proverbs 31 AKA the virtuous woman she can seem like a perfect woman. First, I need you to understand that no one is perfect but that does not keep up from trying to become better.
That is what life is about and what the virtuous woman is about. Improving, becoming better, and transforming yourself into her. You can watch my level up video below and you will see that I was far from the virtuous woman, but throughout years I became transformed. Don’t forget to subscribe to my channel here.
This is not to say that now I am perfect because Lord knows I still have a long way to go but when I start talking about becoming the virtuous woman it can sound a little overwhelming.
But transformation is possible and you can get there, so let’s get into it, shall we?
If you want to know the virtuous woman definition, know that this type of woman cannot just be summed up in a word or two.
Specifically, Proverbs 31:10 says:
Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies. (King James Version).
What we know is that this woman must be very valuable if she is worth more than rubies. If you look at other versions such as the New International Version this woman is called a woman of noble character. And in some other versions, it says worth more than rubies and a pearl.
Which both speaks to the rarity of a Proverbs 31 woman. Rubies are rarer than diamonds and in order to get a pearl, it must first mature in an oyster, and then one must go down deep into the bottom of the ocean and find it.
I am not going to too much into this off the fact that I have an entire video on it that you can watch below.
I highly encourage you to go read Proverbs 31:10-30 yourself if you want to go verse by verse and blow by blow to know the in’s and out of this type of woman. BUT in this post, I am not going to take the entire chapter but specific verses that can help transform you into the virtuous woman.
First, Virtuous woman qualities Do not be lazy
She gets up while it is still night; she provides food for her family and portions for her female servants. Proverbs 31: 15
This is not to say that you have to stay up until 2 am and then rise and 4 am and just work yourself to death with no sleep. But in the end, you need to be a responsible woman.
Do not be that woman that if someone comes to your house and wants something to eat, you do not have any food to give them because you forgot to go grocery shopping.
Do not be that woman that sits around in her bed sleeping the day away not really doing anything much. And if you are a mother, do not sit around all day while your children are doing God knows what around the house and you are just sitting there watching a soap opera telling them to be quiet because you do not want to deal with them.
Get up, get your kids ready for school, feed them, have food for yourself, and for guests. Do not spend all of your time sleeping and/or sitting around the house all day knowing there is stuff to do, but you just do not feel like getting up and doing it.
She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks. Proverbs 31: 17
As a single mother I have worked more than my fair share, I have gotten my Master’s and my Ph.D. degree both as a single mother and I held a job while doing it.
Am I saying that you need to be like me? No, I am not. What I am saying that in order to be a woman worth more than rubies, one that is rare, and that stands out know that it does not come easy.
You cannot be a virtuous woman that has NOTHING what so ever going for herself. What I am saying is that you should work hard to get what you want out of life. You should work hard to be the best version of yourself and not expect other people to live your life for you or make excuses.
When you go to work you need to do your job, not just sit around all day watching the time pass by not really doing any work. You also should not be one of those women who does not want anything out of life. Set goals and work hard to reach those goals (see my blog here) that is what a virtuous woman is all about.
I also have a video about why you should chase the purpose and not the man that you should watch. Because when you are about your own purpose then you put yourself in a position to be found by a good quality man that is equally yoked to you.
She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Proverbs 31: 27
What goes on in your house should be your own business. Never ever should you not know what is going on in your house or who you are letting in your house?
Never ever should the police come knocking on your door because you have your boyfriend who is wanted for murder or something crazy and you did not know. Just like the Bible says:
The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down. Proverbs 14: 1
Know what goes on in your home, know who you let in your home, make sure your financial affairs are in order for your home. Make sure your bills are paid, your rent is paid, your mortgage is paid, and do not get so lazy that it slips your mind to take care of the affairs in your household.
Secondly, Virtuous woman qualities ~ Invest Wisely
I love the following verses because the Proverbs 31 woman is a freakin BOSS. She has a business, she is smart, nowhere does it say that she just sits there and plays the wallflower, looks pretty, and does nothing.
She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings, she plants a vineyard. Proverbs 31: 16
She sees that her trading is profitable and her lamp does not go out at night. Proverbs 31:18
I am not telling you that you need to go out there and buy a whole bunch of stocks and bonds. What these versus speaks to is that you must learn how to use your money wisely and not spend it on things that will turn you no profit. Also do not spend your time on things that will not turn you a profit.
I will use myself as an example. I am a blogger and I take personal pride in my blog and I work very hard on it. When I am not working on my blog I spend time, sometimes money, energy, and effort learning more about blogging so that I can improve the way I do things.
What I am trying to say is that these are all profitable investments that will serve me well in the future, turn a profit, and bring back investment for me and my family. Now turn that situation back on yourself.
- Do you spend money on things that will not earn you a return?
- Do you spend all of your money instead of making saving a priority?
- Do you need the latest fashions, shoes, and that is where all of your money goes?
- Are you spending your time on things that will help you in the future such as college?
- Do you even know or think about what you want to do in the future? Do you have a plan?
Know that none of those material things will make you better (see my blog on vanity). You cannot live in them. You cannot drive to work with these things. And you cannot send your children to college with it.
So is it really a profitable investment? Whenever you make household decisions, determine if the decision that you are making helping you or hurting you.
Third ~ Do not Be Selfish
She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy. Proverbs 31: 20
I am not saying that you have to empty your bank account and give all your money to the poor. But if you are a Christian then you do realize that it is your obligation to be Christ like. HENCE the whole Christ in Christian.
People should be able to tell that you are Christian, without you saying it. They should be able to tell based on how kind you are, how you treat people, and how you act.
Fourth, the Proverbs 31 virtuous woman is Prepared
When it snows, she has no fear for her household; for all of them are clothed in scarlet. Proverbs 31: 21
Winter comes every year and therefore it would not be wise to have your heat turned off right before a big snow storm. Or who wants to get into a car accident right after they let their car insurance lapse.
Granted we cannot be prepared for everything, but we should still try our best to prepare for the things we can prepare for. That is why this verse says that a virtuous woman does not fear, the reason that she does not fear is that she has prepared her household.
Her house is clothed in thick clothing in the middle of winter. Never, would a virtuous woman send her children out in bathing suits to school with no coat when it is below freezing outside because she forgot to buy them winter clothes?
She would be the woman that bought the coats when it was a sale on winter clothes months before. The clothes have been sitting in the closet in preparation for winter.
Of course, this is an extreme example but if you are the type of woman that feels that life keeps happening to you, then you need to start asking yourself how can you prepare yourself better so that when life happens it does not keep you down and out.
Fifth, Being the Woman God Wants You To Be
And of course, I have a video on this that you can watch and well, and once again don’t forget to subscribe to my channel by clicking here.
Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies. Proverbs 31: 10
A fact about a ruby is that it is rarer than a diamond. Imagine how much we value diamonds, and a virtuous woman is worth more and is rarer than that.
That is how you should act and that is how you should come across to other people. Like a gem, not a cheap knock off that is just trying to imitate a gem. Not one that appears as if she has her life together but once you get to know her it is everything but.
If you are going to BE about it then BE about it. Don’t be fake. Don’t be a plastic gem that is painted red trying to look like a ruby but really you are not.
Know your value, know your worth, and act like a gem. I wrote about this in my Proverbs 31 woman blog (which you can click here to read). No matter what other women are doing and how they are acting they are the cubic zirconia you be the gem.
Never sink down to the level to a knock off if you are the real thing. Always be that rare valuable gem that a man feels lucky to find and that people feel lucky to know.
She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. Proverbs 31: 25
You should have confidence when you speak and when you walk. As a woman, there is often hidden strength that you have (see my blog here for the role of a woman). Even though you may get down and out do not stay down and out. Be strong have dignity and laugh at whatever comes your way. Because as long as God is for you then who can be against you.
She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. Proverbs 31: 26
One thing that you have to master is your tongue. If you are confused about how to do that then I encourage you to read my how to sound smart blog.
People often think that going off on other people is a strength when it really shows a lack of self-control. It is better to speak wise and professional to people. Even when people try to upset you should know how to articulate your words in a manner that demands respect but is not demeaning.
Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Proverbs 31: 30
I personally believe in being beautiful from the inside and out. But in the end, you are not going to be young forever. Your beauty will fade and you will get older.
But one thing that should never fade is your belief in God, your faith, and what He can do for you. Even though we waiver God doesn’t. And this is this faith that the virtuous woman has in God that truly makes her a woman that is worth more than rubies. I also have a blog that will teach you how to pray to become the Proverbs 31 woman (click here).
Now that you know what a virtuous woman is, it is truly my hope that each and every one of you reading this blog becomes her. We all have flaws none of us is perfect, and I know that a virtuous woman sounds insanely impossible to become.
But, she is not. Work on yourself, how you behave, what you do, your relationship with God, and you can become the virtuous woman that is worth more than rubies.
If you know a virtuous woman or a virtuous woman in training that could read this post, then feel free to share it with her.