Dating Mind Games That Men Play & How To Not Fall Prey

This may come as a complete shock to you but there are mind games men play with women on dates. I know we would all like to believe that people have the best intentions for us on a date and that the fluff that men feed to us is genuine BUT sometimes, in fact, many times, that is simply not true. Men play mind games with women on a date because they want to feed you a pipe dream to get what they want out of you. And for each man that can be different. Attention, sex, money, pretending to be someone else so they don’t lose you, or many things for many reasons.

This is not to say that a man who plays mind games on you cannot turn into a relationship eventually sometimes they can. But allowing it to turn into a relationship means that you let these men know that you do not have stupid written across your forehead and it is much better, to be honest with you, and that is the way to get further with you, then it is to play games.

BUT if you do feed into the mind games that men play then you will be taken advantage of, men will see you as naive, and your relationship will not go anywhere, and if it does you have the potential to be undervalued as men think they are getting over on you and you are too into them to notice.

In the book that I talk about often Played or be Played (click here to buy), he says that all women need to have “game” which he defines as:

The word game, in street terms, simply means intelligence, hustle, and common sense. And having game means being knowledgeable about every endeavor you choose to engage in. If you don’t have game, in every aspect of your life, there will be people who will simply try to get over on you.

If you do not have game AKA you cannot recognize the mind games men are spitting to you then you are at risk of becoming the woman chasing after a man trying to get him to pay attention to you. Because you feel you had such a wonderful date, and now you cannot imagine what went wrong as to why he is not paying attention to you or things are not going as you thought. You went wrong by being naive and here is how you can not be naive. And before we get into the post, don’t forget to check out my video on this subject, and subscribe to my channel by clicking here.

Mind game #1: Recognize That ALL Men No Matter How Nice Probably Have An Agenda And That Agenda is Sex

In Steve Harvey’s book Act Like a Lady Think Like a Man (Click here to buy) Steve lays things out very clearly that a man’s first goal is to sleep with you.

For a man, it’s less complicated: He doesn’t care anything about your personality or what you do for a living; your friends mean nothing to him, and whether you know Jesus is irrelevant. He just wants to know if he might be able to sleep with you, and he’s talking to you to determine exactly how much he has to invest to get what he wants.

So, understand the faster a man can figure out how to sleep with you on a date the better for him and he is willing to say or do anything to achieve his goal. So when he says come to Netflix and Chill instead of inviting you out on a real date his real motive is to sleep with you and not spend any money.  When on a date he keeps feeding you alcohol and then invites you back to his place that is just a way that he wants to loosen your inhibitions to make it easier to sleep with you. When he tells you that he does not care that a woman has sex on a first date ALL of that is a lie he is just saying that so he can sleep with you.

The Solution to this mind game men play on women

Don’t sleep with him DUH! Do not drink too much alcohol, do not do everything but penetration and feel like because you did not sleep with him it is all good, do not wear anything that looks too skimpy that oozes sex because that is what he will see you as, and do not talk about sex.  Just because his goal is to sleep with you does not mean the relationship cannot turn into something deeper. But for that to happen the person has to get to know you first. And if you have sex with a man too soon all that curiosity will fade because he got what he wanted and he will go away. The men who are more interested in you will stay and ideally when he gets to know you if he likes you then here comes the relationship. And if he was only interested in sex he will go away when you don’t give it to him. All of which helps you from men who are looking for something deeper versus men who are looking for just sex.

Mind game #2 Men Will Try To Make You Think That His Money Is Your Money, But It Isn’t

This is true for men who have money because many of them feel that they are so rare that they can just start flapping their money in your face, and giving you the impression that one day his money can be your money, thus you will become his personal lapdog because you are willing to do anything to get into their pockets. On the first date, a man has told me about all the homes he had, his Range Rover, and then he told me that he would take me on a trip to Hawaii right before he offered to take me to a hotel to soak in a hot tub (remember the above tip). All of which was a no thanks.

The Solution to this mind game men play on women

Do you want a man that is is a provider and a productive member of society? YES, you do. But having your life together is a given not a bonus. Granted some people make more than others BUT more than anything you are not for sale, you are not an escort, and his money and not your money and HE knows that. But he just thinks that you don’t know that.

If you start drooling over his money then this will turn into let me dangle money over your head to get what I want, sex when I want, to get you to act how I want you to act and now you are property, not a person. And he knows it. And he will treat you as such. Instead, act like it does not impress you much. It shouldn’t because you have your own thing going on and your own money. That is not to say that you don’t want a man that is not doing well for himself, you do but you want someone who loves you, respects you, and doesn’t think that throwing money in your face is the way to your heart.

You are not a stripper. For the above guy, I never went out on a date with him again despite him calling me. I felt his actions were disrespectful as far as flaunting his money in my face the rest of my date consisted of him trying to molest me, take me to the nicest bar (and he let me know it) to get me drunk, and reminded me of what I could have if I became his wife. This was the first date mind you. I was over it. Just like it says in the book Played or Be Played and as I said in my self-reflection blog you should be an A-class female and A-class females have their own.

They are very attractive women who have a lot of game to back up their looks. They are the most successful of all the classes of women, and this is why they can choose from a better selection of men at their disposal.

Meaning that you should know that you are the type of woman that knows you can pull another man and therefore you don’t have to sit and be thirsty for this one, no matter how much money, things, or how what material possessions he says he is going to give you. You are not an object and you are not for sale. When you play into being hypnotized with the shiny things he puts in front of you, then you become something that he owns and can easily be manipulated with the mention of some dollar bills.

And if you are not the A class woman then you need to become one. Check out my Patreon (click here) where I teach you how to level up your life.

Mind Game #3: He Is Holy Ghost Filled And Fire Baptized

As a Christian, myself MEN love to play this mind game on me or at least try. Some men can really be Christian but the sure way to tell is not what they say BUT what they do. Just like the Bible says you will know them by their fruits. Just like I said in my book for single women (which you can click here to buy).

“Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep's clothing but inwardly are ravenous wolves. You will recognize them by their fruits. Are grapes gathered from thornbushes or figs from thistles? So, every healthy tree bears good fruit, but the diseased tree bears bad fruit. Matthew 7:15-17 (NIV)

These men are what I like to refer to as wolves. They are just pretending to be sheep so that they can get at you. But as the Bible verse says, you can also tell what a person is by the type of fruit that he bears. A wolf can pretend to be a sheep all day long. But one day, that wolf is going to get hungry and will need to eat meat and not grass like the rest of the sheep. One day, the wolf's teeth are going to show. And one day, the wolf will not be able to maintain his composure and will come out and gobble up one of the sheep. A wolf can only pretend for so long. Eventually, his true colors are going to show.

You can buy my book by clicking here or get the first few chapters free by clicking here or the picture below.

Christian single women

Hence, when I was on a date a man found out I was a Christian. Then he talked about how much he went to church, how much he loved Joel Osteen, and how he went to Joel’s church personally BUT in the same token tried to convince me to have come back and have a one night stand with him, so Jesus went out of the window really quick. But that does bring me to my point that a man will use God, the Lord, and anything that he can think of that is important to you and he will pretend that it is important to him to get closer to you.

The Solution to this mind game men play on women

Some may find it flattering that men randomly come up with things that they are interested in, in order to impress them and/or sleep with them. Although the effort is nice, it is not real. You don’t want to fall in love with or continuously date a man that you do not know. One who just repeats backs to you what is important to you to get what they want from you when really they could care less.

Which is why on a date I recommend pulling WAYYYYYY back. Yes, talk and be conversational but do not tell them exactly what you are looking for, and every detail about yourself because they are just going to imitate what you said and to win you over and not reflect who they are. And the last thing you want to do is to be dating, having sex with or falling in love with a fraud.

True Story:

When I used to do couples counseling the couple was ready to get a divorce a few months into their marriage. The wife complained that her husband was not the same man that she fell in love with. And he responded that he pretended to be whoever he needed to be to win her and now that they were married he could stop pretending. And he could be the real him but she did not like the real him.

Now you may look at this and say at least he married her but as someone who counseled this couple and literally a few months after their $30,000 wedding was over they both wanted to get a divorce, I hardly feel that him faking the funk to win her over was worth having a ring on her finger. Who wants to go through the heartache and remember the more you spend your time with the wrong one the more time that is keeping you away from the right one. So you would rather see through the mind games men play so that you don’t end up wasting your time.

Mind Game #4 The Promise of Marriage

Now, this is probably the biggest mind games men play. It’s like men know that women have wedding bells in their ears and on the weekends they are trying on wedding dresses even though they are as single as can be. And so men play off the woman’s desperation to get married. On a first date, a man has claimed my son, told me I am the one, and it is easy for so many women to get swept up in infatuation and think that this is true love when really it is ridiculous. This person does not know you and do not let the need to want to get married have you looking like booboo the fool dropping your panties on after a first date just because a man told you he wants you to meet his mom and marry you. He is full of crap, he does not know you, and he is playing with your head.

The Solution to this mind game men play on women

Keep a level head, when you think about why so many people have their friends for 10, 15, or even 20 years it is because they get to know their friends in and out. But when it comes to a relationship it cannot even last past a few months to a year because women just leap off the cliff and into the hands of a man that makes false promises just because it is what they want to hear when it is probably not true. Remember tip #1 men want to sleep with you as soon as possible and if they feel like telling you they want to marry you on the first date will get them there, so be it! Check out my video on why you should not rush a relationship to find out how to avoid a man playing with your head by making you false promises. Don’t forget to subscribe to my channel by clicking here.

These are the most prevalent mind games that men play with women on dates, are at least the biggest ones that I have seen and experienced first hand. Of course, the biggest thing that you can do is use common sense, and not get swept away on what you want a man to be on dates but pay attention to who they actually are and what they are showing you. And I promise you this is the key to not getting your feelings hurt, weeding out the wrong ones, and keeping a level head about some of these men. If you know a woman that may be a victim of some of these mind games then share this post with her to help her out so that she can keep herself from getting played.

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