To listen to the blog post “5 Ways To Handle People Talking Behind Your Back” click the play button below.
People talking behind your back is something that is always going to happen. And even though it happens I am going to teach you how to not get phased by it. I think this goes without saying that you cannot control other people and therefore you cannot MAKE them stop talking about you. If they don’t like you they don’t like you and that is pretty much it.
And guess what if they want to talk about you it is not like you can sew their mouth shut to make them stop. And since I have just explained to you that you cannot control other people the only option is to control yourself. Meaning that you cannot control people talking behind your back but you can control the way to react to people talking behind your back. And I am going to tell you how to do exactly that.
Also, check out my video down below for more tips on how to deal with toxic people. And don’t forget to subscribe to my Youtube channel by clicking here.
People Talking Behind Your Back Tip #1 Focus on You and Not On Them.
You have your own life to worry about. If you are too busy pursuing your own dreams, making yourself happy, doing you, and living your best life then that is less time you do not have time to pay attention to what other people are doing or what other people are saying about you. Read my blog in on (I have more Important Things to worry about, which means I don’t have time to worry about you).
Focus on what you are doing and remained un-phased about what other people are saying about you. Do not even let what they are saying about you take up any more of your thoughts or energy.
People Talking Behind Your Back Tip #2 Keep Your Mouth Shut.
I spoke about assertive communication versus aggressive communication in my blog here. Being aggressive in your communication is not going to solve the people talking behind your back problem. It is going to make it worse. Because even though they are wrong, when you become aggressive they are not going to see what THEY did wrong they are only going to see what YOU did wrong and your aggressive behavior is going to only give them more communication to talk about you and call you a psycho that does not know how to control herself.
When you are a boss and you are a classy woman (click my blog here) and classy women know when to speak and know when you be quiet. They know how to articulate themselves, they know how to always remain professional and classy when need be, they know how to have good emotional regulation. Which all that really means is that you know how to control yourself and not just pop off at the mouth.
This is not the Bad Girl’s Club you are not trying out for the Bad Girl’s Club so no need to audition with your behavior. There is no need to argue down people who do not like and who are talking behind your back. Because no matter what you say, they are just going to go behind your back and talk about you even more. So why waste time, energy, or even breathe trying to tell people off or get people to like you? If they have made up in their mind that they don’t like you, then there is little you can say to change their mind about it. Also, check out my video on how to be on your grown woman status to see other behaviors you may need to get rid of.
People Talking Behind Your Back Tip #3 Let Your Haters Be Your Motivators
The best way to get back at those who hate you is to give them more to hate on. Keep rising higher and keep doing better. Allow their negative words to be the driving force behind your success. The fact of the matter is that people who talk behind your back want to see you fail. So why give them the satisfaction of letting them affect you that much that you fail.
Do the opposite and let their hate motivate you. The biggest way to shut people up is to show them how well you can do in life despite how they tried to bring you down. If they are going to talk about you then you mine as well keep doing you, keep doing better, and keep being better and give them something to really talk about. Just say to yourself:
- You Talking About Me Is Another Form Of Flattery
People Talking Behind Your Back Tip #4 Get Flattered.
On the note of being flattered, get flattered. I mean think about it. Someone is taking time out of their busy day, to talk about you, think about you, and give all of their attention at that moment to you. The time that they can never get back is wasted on YOU. So when you think about it you should be flattered that they want to spend that much time worrying about you and having your name in their mouths. You must be that awesome that thinking and talking about you is how they want to spend their time.
The way I see it, the more you talk about me the more flattered I am, because that means I have distracted you from your life so much that you have thought enough of me to take time out of your busy schedule to talk about me. That must mean that I am doing something right. Oftentimes people talking about you is just them being jealous of you (read my blog here on jealous people), so if someone wants to talk about you then let them because they feel you are worth talking about. And in a way that is a compliment that people are choosing to spend time (that they will never get back) worried about what you are doing.
People Talking Behind Your Back Tip #5 Kill Them with Kindness
Yes, that is right, I said it. I know that it is easier said than done because most people who are mean to us want us to be mean to them back. BUT as a Christian, I learned that this is the BEST way to be. Check out the following Bible verse:
Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. 1 Peter 3:9
Call it you reaping what you sow, karma, or reciprocity. Whatever you want to call it you have to believe that when you do good, even when someone else is doing you badly, that good will come back to you. No matter how many people talk about you or how many people hate you. Always repay evil for good (see my blog here). Also, check out my video down below on how to clap back as a Christian.
"Even, if people don’t like you at least make it so that they respect you. Always keep your reputation good even in the midst of people who are doing you bad."
And I am convinced that no matter how bad people are toward you, that you should NEVER stoop down to their level of immaturity. Not because of them but because of you. You never want to harbor those types of negative emotions and you never want to become like them. Don’t block your own blessings. And more than anything just believe that when you are nice to people then you must believe that it is going to come back to you in some way shape or form.
If you know someone who could use this information then feel free to share this post with them. Also, check out my Christian Manifestation Guide if you need positive affirmations to help you deal with people talking behind your back. Click here to buy.