To listen to the entire blog post instead of reading it “30 and Single” just click the play button below.
Being 30 and single can be one of the scariest times for many women. For me personally as a woman that is well over 30 and single I do not care….like at all. But I understand that there are women who do care, who are depressed about being 30 and single, who are lonely and are 30 and single and they are not sure what they can do about it.
From an over 30 and single woman to an over 30 and single woman, which is you, in this case, let’s be open to talking about some of your fears. And what you can do to eliminate those fears. You can also check out my YouTube video about being single and 30 for additional tips below and do not forget to subscribe to my YouTube channel here.
1. 30 and Single ~ Your biological clock is ticking.
So, I am not going to sit up here and tell you that this is not a realistic fear because in all actually it is. But it is also very realistic that many people have children in their 30 and even in their 40’s. And some people adopt or end up marrying men who have children making you a stepmom.
What I am saying is that nothing is final and there is no need to continue to drive yourself into fear about not being able to have kids when in reality in this day and age there are SOOO many ways to have kids. Instead of fearing consider this.
Nothing is impossible.
In the Bible God promised Abraham and Sarah and child in which they thought it would never happen. So much time had past and then God came to Abraham and said the following.
Abraham bowed with his face to the ground and thought, “I am almost a hundred years old. How can I become a father? And Sarah is ninety. How can she have a child? Genesis 17:17
Yeah, I get that you probably are not trying to have a child in your 90s. But the point is that nothing is final, you never know, and never doubt what God can do for you. I would rather choose faith in God than fear of the unknown.
Freezing Your Eggs
I had a friend that was nearly 40 and she chose to go this route. She did not know if she wanted kids and she was well over 30 and single, and she still wanted the option. And so, instead of focusing on fear focus on a solution. If you are 30 and single and worried about children or not being able to have them, you can take actions to freeze your eggs so that when you do get married you will have that option.
Keep Yourself Healthy
You may be single and 30 and want kids in the future and that is why it is important to keep your body in optimal condition. Feed your body well, exercise, take vitamins. You may not have anyone in sight as far as marriage but so what? When you do and you want to have kids it is better for your body to be in optimal condition to make that happen. So focus on these solutions over the fears of being 30 and single.
2. Second, I Am 30 and Single So No One Will Want Me
When I did my first YouTube video about being single over 30 many years ago so many men gave hate on that video about being 30 and a single and how no man will want them. If you feed into that narrative, then you are feeding the fear. To say that no one will want you is silly.
Because women age just like men age, at the same rate. And not all 30 something and over year old man want 20 something year old. They are probably going to get with women their age.
Men say stuff like this to women to feed into their insecurities and when they can make you feel insecure about your age they can talk women into being in a relationship with them where they just accept anything, which is why having low self-esteem and relationships don’t mix. Because they have fed the narrative that women who are 30 and single have no options so they just have to accept whatever man comes their way.
That says something more about the man then it does about the woman, they are 30 and single men AND 30 and single women and more than likely they are going to pair up together. You can see my video on some of the hate comments I got on the video and how I addressed them below.
3. 30 and Single Third, I Look Too Old
I have watched this YouTuber and I am not going to shout her out here but she is a woman and she constantly gives this narrative that women over 35 are washed up and have a harder time finding a man and their attraction fades.
Which once again is SIMPLY NOT TRUE. At the time of writing this blog, I am 36 years old and you can see the picture below that I look better than I ever have. Even in my younger years. The left picture is me in my 20’s and right my MID 30’s.
I learned to dress better, to drink more water, to take care of skin (click here for my blog on that), and to have a freakin glow up physically. And even now to this day when I go to order alcohol I still get ID and mistaken for someone in my 20s.
And my mother who s in her 50’s STILL gets mistaken for a woman in her 30s! You do not have to look old, you can take care of your skin and your body AND you can look your best.
You can read my blog here on how I lost over 70 pounds and also check out my video on taking care of your appearance.
Drink water, in fact, most of the time I drink sparkling water. I do not drink sodas or even juices hardly ever. It keeps your skin young and hydrated.
Take vitamins, you can take beauty vitamins such as the ones below. That keeps the elasticity in your skin and have other essential nutrients that can keep your appearance younger.
And finally do not be afraid to use beauty products. You can wear makeup; you can have age defiant beauty cream. One of the beauties of living in this day and age is that there are many products that are dedicated to keeping you looking your best.
At the end of the day being 30 and single seems scary, yes you have fears, but you are not the only one and there are things that you can do about it. There are plenty of women who get married after 30. There are plenty of women who enjoy their life (see my blog here) even when they are single and are happy. I am one of them.
Be one of those women, you can put yourself out there. Go to places where you can meet productive men (see my blog here). Get on a dating app that is geared toward meeting mature and single men. Watch my video below on the exclusive dating app Luxy. And don’t forget to subscribe to my channel here.
And most of all don’t fear, you are beautiful and you are a freakin boss in case no one has told you. Don’t feed into fears but rise above them. AND also get my book for single women which you can click here buy. Or click here and I will send you the first few chapters for free.
Hi, I agree with you but you forgot to mention adoption. There are so many black children up for adoption. I knew single black women who have adopted kids. You don’t have to wait for the PERFECT GUY to start a PERFECT FAMILY.
Also there is time to you can devote to other things than chasing a man. For instance, going back to school perhaps graduate school. Volunteer more, church more. Get involved.
Just keep doing for yourselves. You know you need to work a descent job for at least two years. Work on your credit ( work in your personal finances period. ) and you can purchase a new house, or a new car. After you become a success in one area in your life work on another.