To listen to the blog post “This Is Why You Struggle With Self Confidence” over reading it just click the play button below.
One of the best compliments that I get is that I have high self confidence. This is not to brag, or to say that I am special, or that there is anything unique about me. The fact of the matter is that there are many reasons why people struggle from low self confidence and that is what I am going to talk about in this post.
And for each reason on why you struggle with self confidence I am going to tell you how to build it. It is my personal belief that anyone can learn how to build self confidence and understand that when you do your relationships will get better your friendships and just your life in general.
Because all of a sudden you will be okay being you and okay with putting yourself out there. I think I have made this introduction long enough, let’s get into it shall we?
First, You Care Too Much About What Other People Think
I have written a blog on this before which you can click here to read but the fact of the matter is that so many people tend to care so much about what other people think and when you do this the following happens:
- You give people control over you and therefore you conform to how they want you to act instead of being yourself.
- Your self confidence get’s wrapped up in other people validate you.
How To Build Self Confidence In This Situation
I have a video on how to be confident which you can watch below and don’t forget to subscribe to my YouTube Channel by clicking here. But I also suggest you read the best selling book The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life (which you can click my affiliate link here to read).
The MAIN reason why I am so self confident is that I do not care about what other people think about me, I do not care about if they like me or if they don’t like me. I do not care if they want to be m friend and I do not do backflips in order to impress people.
Many people think that if they do the MOST to try to impress people, people will like them and that their self confidence will boost. But see when people know this they tend to take advantage of you. You are not a dog for goodness sake having to do tricks for a dog bone or a treat.
But this is how people will see you if you care too much about what other people think, changing who you are because of what they have done or said to you. But when you change, and you start to behave according to your own standard then that is when you became more self confident and when people actually start respecting you for who you are.
Second, You Are A Freakin Sheep or A Duck
Some people call it a sheep and some people call it a duck but they are both the same thing. This pretty much means that you are sitting in a flock of other sheeps or ducks, following the crowd, not standing out, and too afraid to be yourself.
Think of it like this, if you are just mindlessly following the flock of sheep or ducks then what is special about you? When it comes to self confidence your inner self is just dying to be itself. That is what you were created for. So when you suppress then and reduce yourself to a sheep or a duck being less than what God created you to be, then that is when you struggle with self confidence because you are not being you.
How to build self confidence in this case
I have a blog on how to be an eagle over a duck and I also have a video on it below that you can watch to help you out.
Third, You Are Afraid To Speak Up For Yourself
I have meant many women who actually suffer from this. They are afraid to speak up for themselves because they think that what they have to say will sound stupid like they will sound argumentative, or people will not like their opinion. And as a result, their voice gets lost or when they do speak up they tend to sound very unsure of themselves and the fact that they are not confident tends to show.
How to build your self confidence in this case.
Just speak up for yourself. I know it is easier said than done but you have to take baby steps. If someone is walking all over you, trying to embarrass you, or you disagree then just say something. I bet you the results will not be as bad as you think.
And most of all you need to learn how to communicate in an assertive way (which you can click my blog to read) not aggressive but assertive and know how to communicate in a smart way (which I have blog post on). This does not mean that you are going to be quoting Aristotle but if you are confident in the way to articulate yourself and what you are saying it is a lot easier for you to speak with confidence.
Fourth, Because You Feel Inferior
If you are lacking self confidence because you feel inferior then it is about time that you change that. Some people feel like they are not as smart as other people, or they do not have anything really going on for themselves and therefore they are not confident. And that is understandable, if you are living below your potential and not doing anything much with your life then of course it is easy to feel less confident.
If this is the case where is what you can do.
If you are lazy and unmotivated and you find it hard to reach your goals, then click my blog here where I teach you how to deal with that. But most importantly you and only you are responsible for your life.
Find goals, get a purpose, find something to do with your life that can make you feel proud. Which is what I talk about in my video on why it is important to level up. Please watch it so that you can understand why living your best life can help you feel more confident.
Fifth, Because of What You Look Like
I know that this is a big one for many people. As a dark skin woman myself, I know what it is like to NOT be the world’s standard of beauty. But do you want to know a secret? Beauty is subjective. That means that you are beautiful only because someone says you are and you can be that person.
Everyone is beautiful to someone just like everyone is ugly to someone. Just like the supermodels are still ugly to someone and that is why you cannot lack self confidence in what you look like because someone will always have something to say about your looks.
Instead here’s what you can do.
As someone who has experienced this personally, I gained so much weight and I was over 200 pounds where my confidence suffered that was until I lost 60 pounds. My point is that you can level up and do what you can to improve your physical appearance to the best of your ability.
I have a blog on how to workout at home which you can click here that can help get you into shape thus helping you feel more confident. I talk about how I had bad acne and the products I used (click here) to help clear up my skin to help me feel more confident.
If you subscribe to my YouTube channel here you will see that I have tons of beauty, makeup, and even nail tutorials because I learned how to enhance my own beauty in my own way. I highly suggest you watch my video below as well where I talked about beauty.
In the end, I have been called gorgeous in my life and I have been called ugly in my life. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Just become your best self-according to your own requirements, learn to love what you look like and other people will start to believe you look as awesome as you portray yourself to be. I also have a separate blog you can read here where I did case studies on women upgraded their appearance.
These are some of the common reasons why peoples struggle with self confidence and also how to build self confidence forever issue you suffer with. If you know someone who may need to read this post then share it with them.