Dating Vs A Relationship 5 Ways To Tell The Difference

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Dating vs a relationship there is a difference, but sad to say most women actually don’t know that. Knowing the difference can alleviate a lot of hurt feelings.

Some women think they are in a relationship when really a man is just dating her (and other women) and she dumbfounded when she does not get the affection or attention that she wants from the man she believes she is in a relationship with.

I was recently having a conversation with a friend, who thought she was in a relationship with a man.  They had only been in a “relationship” (but it was more like dating) for a few weeks, and now she was telling me that their so-called relationship was over and she could not figure out why.

And even worse, with just a few weeks he had moved on to someone else.  She thought they were in love. As she told her story, her story sounded like so many other women’s stories.

And the answer to her questions was that she did not know the difference between dating and relationship and made the sad mistake of thinking that just because a man asked her out or went on a few dates with her that these were indications of an actual exclusive commitment. Sorry ladies, it isn’t.

Dating vs a relationship ~ Definition Of Dating

According to Zoosk the definition of dating is listed below. I have always highlighted some words for you so that you can really absorb the idea of dating and what it means.

If you can check these off your list, you are, in fact, dating someone:

1. You like someone and you’re trying to get to know them better.

2. You’re spending time with a person (or persons) in hopes of finding a committed relationship.

3. You can see yourself settling down (or at least entertain the idea) with the person or persons you see regularly.

Basically, dating comes down to intention. If you intend to get to know someone because you’re interested in seeing if there’s a future.

It is when a man is going out with you and he is taking you on dates.  He may be dating other women.  Unless he has told you that he wants to enter into an exclusive dating situation with you, I would bet that he is dating someone else.

Here’s what “dating” isn’t—it’s no exclusivity. Not guaranteed exclusivity, anyway. Even as things grow more serious, exclusivity is something that always requires a frank conversation about what each party wants, and without that conversation, it’s not safe to assume the two of you are on the same page.

Regardless of how much time has passed, how often you see each other, etc., two people being committed to each other, always requires that awful, painful, awkward conversation. Always.

In fact, I would assume that unless a man has had a conversation with you and literally said I WANT YOU TO BE MY GIRLFRIEND or I WANT TO BE IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH YOU. Then you are just dating and since dating does not imply exclusivity I would also assume that if you are only dating then he is also dating someone else.  Which is fine because that means that you can date (not sleep with) other men too. 

I also have a video on why you too should be dating more than one man until a man commits to you and wants to be in a relationship with you.  Watch it below and don’t forget to subscribe to my channel by clicking here.

Dating vs a relationship ~ Relationship Definition:

Dating vs a relationship when it comes to being in a relationship according to Zoosk An exclusive relationship is a mutual agreement between two people that neither one is romantically pursuing other partners.

Let me break it down for you. This is when a man comes to you and ask you upfront if you want to be in an exclusive, one on one, relationship with him and not date other people.  Yes, it is that specific.  If he does not or has not said that then you are not in a relationship.

If he tells you that he doesn’t want to be in a relationship but he just wants to see you then you are still NOT in a relationship.  In order to be in a relationship, it must be said and agreed to by both people. BOTH people must know that they are in a relationship. You cannot decide that you are in a relationship with him without him knowing that he is your boyfriend.

Dating vs a relationship “Are we dating?”

So many women have this question, but really it is not hard.  Either a man is taking you out on a date or he isn’t.  If you want to know what dating a man means, then you should know that when a man really wants to date you he is doing most or all of these things.

  • Asking you out on a date.
  • Planning the date.
  • Paying for the date.
  • Picking you up for a date.

And once one date is over, he will repeat these steps.  That is how you know if you are dating.  And dating usually precedes a relationship.

Dating vs a relationship ~ Why Dating Must Come Before The Relationship

The fact of the matter is that anyone can say that they are in a relationship. However, it takes true work to be in a relationship. What a relationship is not, are you finding someone, being attracted to them, and calling them your boyfriend or girlfriend.

Then after a month or so, you find out you do not really like them or they do not really like you and then you jump to someone else and that person is now your boyfriend or girlfriend. Remember when we talked about the definition of dating?

The point of dating is to get to know someone to determine if you like them and want to be in an exclusive relationship with them. That is why it is important to maximize your dating time and not to rush into a relationship until you are sure that this is what you want to do.

So knowing the difference between dating and relationship helps you understand the concept behind both and why you need both. And where your relationship stands.  So just because you are dating and not in a relationship that is not a bad thing.

Overall, relationships are about a mutual understanding of one another, coming together for a purpose, and enriching each other’s life. And actually dating and getting to know the man before a relationship is a good thing. Also, check out my video below on real love for an example of good long-lasting relationships.

Dating vs a relationship ~ What If He Doesn’t Want A Relationship

Dating vs a relationship, you cannot make anyone do or be something that they do not want to be. In fact, I have a blog on this if he is saying that he loves you or wants to date you but he does not want to commit, read it here.  If they keep dating you and do not verbalize a relationship after a significant amount of time then you can ask “where is this going?”

There is a difference between dating and a relationship and if you want a relationship and it doesn’t do not let him trick you into thinking it’s the same thing.

If he makes it clear that he does not want a relationship or is evasive about where your dating situation is going, then you just need to go about your business and leave him alone. If a relationship is what you want and he is not willing to give it to you.

Dating vs a relationship ~ Giving yourself the best chances of getting a relationship

Dating vs a relationship is not the question but the bigger issue is that women do not know what to look for. (read my blog in recognizing the counterfeit here). This or that they are too hungry for a man that they are willing to overlook his shortcomings all to say that they are in a relationship. Then they are shocked a few weeks, months, or years down the line when the man disappoints them.

Did they not see this coming? He was a disappointment when you meant him? Why did you think you were going to change him? When you are in the dating phase you NEED to pay attention to who the person really ease. Do not think that getting into a relationship is going to change the essence of the person. And as I mentioned the purpose of dating is to get to know.

Therefore, when you are dating REALLY get to know a man to find out if you even want to be in a relationship with him in the first place. Never fall into infatuation with someone because you are going to overlook key facts that tell you he may not be someone you need to get in a relationship with. Also, check out my video on infatuation so you do not fall into this trap.

Yes they may look good, they may even talk good, but actions speak louder than words (see my blog here). Look at their life, their past history, look at what they do over what they say and this is what would tell you if they are a fit person to be in a relationship with or not.

A lot of relationship issues can be prevented if you refuse to get into “bad” relationships in the first place, and that is what the dating phase is for.  To determine if this man is someone you want to be with.  If a person has a history of having relationships of 3 months and moving on to the next.

This is a red flag. If a man has put a tracking device on your phone without your knowledge after the first date this may be a red flag. If in the dating phase you find out he has 5 baby mamas and 15 children RED FLAG. Something is wrong with this.

You do not need to waste the next 3 months of your life entering into a relationship with a person where you can clearly see that something is wrong here. If you have to wonder “are we dating” and the guy just brings you to his house and tries to get you drunk and has sex with you. Something is wrong here.

And to answer your question NO you are not dating. He does not want a relationship, he wants sex.  And if a guy says he doesn’t want a relationship, then you need to believe him, because he doesn’t.  You have to then determine if you want to waste your time with him.

When you get into a relationship with someone, it is not your job to fix them and try to mold them into the person they are meant to be. Leave that up to them and God. If God cannot do it for them, then please know you certainly cannot make them into the man that you want them to be.

You cannot make anyone love you, you cannot make anyone be in a relationship with you, and you cannot make anyone date you.  Wasting your precious time and effort on someone trying to make them into a person you want to marry only to be disappointed in the end.

If you know another woman that wants to know the difference between a relationship and dating then go ahead and share this post with her. Sharing is caring.

Never get played again and learn all you need to know with my book for single women which you can click here to buy or click here to get the first few chapters for free.

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