A Letter To My Younger Self ~ 3 Life-Long Lessons

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To listen to the blog post “A Letter To My Younger Self ~ 3 Life-Changing Lessons On Love, Life, & Success” over reading it then click the play button below.


I think that everyone should take the time to write a letter to their younger self.  And in this post, I am going to share a letter to my younger self.  When you are younger you always seem to be in a rush. A rush to grow up, a rush to have sex, a rush to be with boys, and rush to do this that and the third never taking time to enjoy the moment. You can watch one of my videos for more lessons on a letter to my younger self. Don’t forget to subscribe to my channel here.

But now as I am a 30 something years old woman and sit and reflect on what all the rushing was about.  There was so much life to be lived and so many moments to be enjoyed which is a point that we really miss as teenagers and young adults. In this post, I am going to give you the most valuable lessons that I would tell my younger self about relationships, friendships, success, and life that can even help you now.

You ready, let’s get into it

A Letter To My Younger Self Lesson #1 See Bigger Picture

Growing up, I was something that they call a military brat.  My mother was in the military and we moved around every 2 or 3 years. Many children stay in the same town from the time they are in kindergarten until they graduate from high school.  Formulating these deep friendships and bonds that last a lifetime with those they grew up with.

But that was not me.  And in a way, I used to be resentful. Always being the new kid, always having to make friends, and always moving every three years leaving my old friends behind. And mind you this was BEFORE the time of social media. It is not like we could just keep in touch. It seemed like such a hassle then but I had the chance to grow up in places like Europe and Hawaii.

A  letter to my younger self ~ What’s my point.

The first piece of advice that I would give to my younger self was to look at the bigger picture. I got to go to places and live places that other people would kill for. The way in which my childhood was structured it helped grow me into the person I am today. Learning to adapt to multiple situations has taught me something called resiliency.   I learned to be culturally aware and look at the world as a whole, not just the one in which I came from. A trait that still carries with me today.

Often times as young people things can seem SO BAD and we can hate them but really they are a blessing in disguise. But we cannot see beyond what we want and therefore we miss the blessing altogether.  So instead of getting resentful about what is going on in your life, take time to be grateful for what is going on in your life.

In a letter to my younger self, I would tell myself to take time to find a positive even if you think there are no positives. The same things about your life that you hate, can turn out to be the biggest blessing later on. That is a lesson I had to learn in my adulthood still which you can see in my video where I talk about my depression.

A Letter To My Younger Self Lesson #2 Sex Is Special

In a letter to my younger self, I want to start off with a story, on my 14th birthday while I was living in Belgium, a woman at church gave me a journal and told me that I could write down all my prayers in it.  And so I maintained a diary from the age of 14-19.  I did exactly what the women wanted me to do.  It was in that journal that I began to talk to God.  Like a friend.

I wrote everything that I thought, felt, good or bad.  In high school, my friends were having sex, really into boys, and doing things that I was very afraid to do.  I just was not that extroverted.  I think I may have still been playing with dolls.  I remember that everyone uses to think I was a prude because I was not doing “grown woman things” if you know what I mean. So then, I took the advice of the woman who gave me the journal and wrote the following poem in it.

A Letter To My Younger Self ~ My Poem At age 15.

This is coming from a friend, I must let you know. 

That Girlfriend You are a Hoe. 

The reason why boys want to tap that a**. 

Is because you do not want the relationship to last. 

They will diss you in public, and think nothing of it. 

And they have you thinking you are all that, when you are just a used up piece of trash. 

You give it up too soon. 

Then they turn, laugh, and call you a fool.  

So what you think they’ll leave their girlfriend for you?

You are just a little tramp they will run to and use. 

No one likes you and talks behind your back. 

And you best believe it girl, that is a fact. 

And just because they act like they want you now,

You wait to other people come around. 

Now you suck his d*** and let him work it all night. 

But other people are calling you a hoe, and you know what? They are right. 

It amazes me how much sense my 15 years old self had.  Yeah, my writing could be a little vulgar.  And I do not encourage anyone to curse at God.  But it was my way of expressing myself and what I thought of the world that was going on around me.  It was not popular for me to think this way as a teen. I should have been into boys, wanting attention from them, but it was not me.

A Letter To My Younger Self ~ What’s my point

It seemed like my 15 years old self had more sense than my young 20-year-old self.  Because somewhere along the lines I lost the sense that my younger self had.  I went through a wild child phase and started doing things that I  looked down on others for doing as a teenager.

If I had to give advice to my younger self I would tell myself to always remember this poem, always remember that sex is special, and do not feel the need to conform to the ways of the world and mess with any and everyone just because that is what everyone else is doing at your age. I would tell my younger self to watch your reputation and remember that you do not have to have sex with men just because they asked or just because it is what everyone else is doing. I would remind my younger self that it is your body and that sex does not make a man love you or want to be with you. I would tell my younger self to wait to have sex and only have sex with a man who deserves it.

A Letter To My Younger Self Lesson #3 It is Not That Serious

Speaking of poems I came across another one. I think it illustrates what goes on inside the teenage mind. At that time in your life everything is so serious and permanent and it seems like nothing is ever going to change or get better.

A Letter To My Younger Self ~ Poem Age 16

I am so confused and isolated inside. 

I feel so lost and it is hard to say why. 

I am in a not in a strange place driving, but it still feels like I’m striving

To get where I want to go. 

But sometimes it seems like I am moving too slow. 

I am trapped and 4 walls are closing in on me. 

I feel I have no friends and all of them are my enemies. 

Their pulling me in all directions, and I hear their words of rejections. 

That is leading down the wrong road, but I keep strong and stay bold.  

There is one thing that I do know, I am going everywhere, but where I want to go. 

A Letter To My Younger Self ~ What’s my point

When reading this I was a very intense teenager.  I cannot help but laugh at the theatrics as well as the similarities to myself now.   If I could tell my younger self something,  I to take a chill pill.  I would tell myself not to be afraid to be weird, stand out, or not to get upset because I do not conform to other peoples’ ideas of how I am supposed to act. Which you can watch my video down below on how to not give a crap.

I would tell myself that not all people who pretend to be your friends are your friends (see blog here) and that this pattern is something that all people do even adults. I would tell myself who cares that your mind works differently and other people do not understand you? Who cares if you have dreams to go above and beyond what anyone can imagine?  It’s okay. Be you, and shine bright like stars were meant to do.

I would tell myself that as an adult you will have three degrees and be a successful person. And all those people who made fun of you, you are doing 10 times better than them. I would tell myself that high school is really just ONE area of your life and you have the rest of your life to live. So do not get caught up in the four years that you are in high school I would tell myself to focus on becoming the best person I can be and do not waste time energy or space on things and people that do not matter.

It is funny because as a 30 something-year-old female I see myself as being so young but when I was a teenager it seemed like I was so old like I got too old too fast, and I just wanted everything to happen right now. More than anything that I would tell my younger self is to just calm down and take enjoyment in each moment and do not be in such a rush to grow up.  I would tell my younger self to calm down that even though you do not have everything you want now, that you will if you just keep working at it.

If you know a young woman that may need to read this advice then go ahead and share this post with them.

PLUS. I have something for you. It is my book specifically for single women that you can click the link to buy.

If you are not sure I want to give you the first chapter for free. All you have to do is click here or the picture below and it is yours.


  1. two snaps and a clap YESSS! I was just like you as a teenager i wrote poems and believe I had more sense about guys back then too. I also have my journals from middle to high school years too and looking back is always this mind blowing experience. God bless you.

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