To listen to the blog post “Top Signs You’re Forcing A Relationship & How To STOP!” over reading it then click the play button below.
If you have been looking all across the internet trying to find how to make a man fall in love with you let me answer that question for you in a nutshell. You can’t. So many women are forcing a relationship with men thinking that they are helping when really it is just running men away.
Let me say it again, you can’t make him fall in love with you. Now there are certain things that women can do to make themselves more desirable and more attractive which I wrote about on my blog about how to get the love life you deserve. But I do not care how many people promise that they can do voodoo, cast a spell, and how many candles you light you cannot make a man fall in love with you.
If you want to know how to attract men then I have a video on things you can do to bring them to you. But forcing a relationship is not one of those things. You can watch my video down below on how to attract men and don’t forget to subscribe to my channel by clicking here.
1. Case in Point Of My Friend Forcing A Relationship With Her Man
In the case of my friend and her forcing a relationship. She did some of the same things that so many women do when it comes to trying to make a man love fall in love with them. First, she tries to go above and beyond to prove what a good girlfriend she is. Then when that does not work, she tells herself that she is the first real woman to love the man and that the man has somehow hardened his heart against love because of the past relationships he has been through.
As a result, my friend felt the need to go harder and push harder so that the man could understand how much she loved him, what a great woman she was, how much of a good person she was, then he will finally love her back. After about a year and a half of this, the man had not changed, still did not love her, and they eventually parted way.
2. Forcing A Relationship Will Never Work If, He Is Not That Into You
As you can see with my friend and so many other women, isn’t it amazing how many excuses a woman can come up with to explain a man’s behavior. Instead of women seeing the situation for what it is. And that is that he is just not that into you many women want to blame some outside force instead of facing the reality that the man you are trying to make love you simply doesn’t. It is not some childhood trauma or some unresolved conflict he has with his mother or past girlfriends. He doesn’t like you.
As women, we so ignore the red flags and makes excuses telling ourselves that he will come around if we just love him hard and long enough. When really he won’t. It is not that he does not know you, it is that he does know you, and based on what you have shown him, he still does not like you. You pushing him, even more, is not going to change that.
3. Second, Forcing A Relationship Won’t Work Because You Can’t Make Anyone Do Anything
I told my friend that it was not her job or her place to make anyone love her. The man is the one who pursues not the other way around. She could not make him accept her love nor should she try to make him accept her love. The fact of the matter is, earning a man’s love is not her job as a woman.
This is the biggest lie that has been told to women. That you need to be a man’s ride or die, that you need to do everything in your power to earn his love, or that you need to do whatever he wants you to do to show him how much you love him.
All the while the man has hit a gold mine because he literally has a modern-day slave that is willing to do anything for him while he does not have to put much effort in at all. Which I talk about in my video below on are trying to prove yourself to a man.
So women, instead of you asking what you can do in order to make him fall in love with you. Turn that question around and ask yourself what has the man done to make you love him. As hard as you want them to love you, you need to be loved as well. You should never be in a position in which you are begging and pleading for a man to be with you.
4. When You Know Your Value You Shouldn’t Have To Force Anyone Into Anything
Forcing a relationship would not even be a thing if women knew their worth. I think that one of the key things that women are missing is that we must start to believe that we are worth it. I am not sure if women think that there is a shortage of men, but we have somehow started fighting other women for men who are not so good in the first place (see my blog here on women fighting over a man). Do not allow a bad man to make you believe that he is a good man and keep you trapped, because he makes you think you cannot do better. Or that if you just loved him harder then maybe he can someday love you back.
I also have a video on what to do if you are a woman seeing a man that does not see your value or your worth. And forcing him into a relationship is not one of those things.
What I am NOT saying is that you should not ever give or do anything for a man. I do believe that you should give to a man BUT I do not believe that you should go above and beyond for a man just to prove yourself worthy so that you can get the same emotion back from him. In my book for single women (click here to buy) I wrote the following:
Being equally yoked means there is a relationship between two people that have similar things to offer each other and balance each other out. One person should not be leeching off the other. One person should not be bringing everything to the table while the other person brings nothing. This balance can come in all different types of ways, but essentially the relationship should NOT be unbalanced.
Meaning that if you find yourself in a situationship and you are the one giving and giving to PROVE yourself worthy. Then you have to ask yourself what is he doing to prove himself worthy to be with you and if it is nothing then go back to reason #1 he is just not that into you.
(PS. If you want to get the first chapter of my book for single women for free then click here or the picture below).
5. Not Forcing A Relationship By Becoming The Hired Help
When I talk about my friend, she did everything to make him love her. Sexed him up really well, cooked his food, and cleaned his house. Any acts of service that she could do try to get him to love her more she did. But I want to keep it real for you women. If the only thing that someone loves about you is what you can do for them then you should be concerned.
If you are doing all of these acts of service for a man and he falls in love with you because of them. Just think about it, he can hire people for that. There is nothing about you that he really loves. He just loves what you can do for him. The same as a maid, a prostitute, or even door dash. If he can literally hire people to replace you then that is not love and certainly not how you would want your man to feel about you.
Understand that no matter how long you have been in a relationship if it is not a good relationship then you can always walk away. What is the point of spending 10 years in a relationship where you feel undervalued and underappreciated? Trying to make him love you. Trying to make him see you or trying to make him marry you. You cannot make him fall in love with you.
You cannot use any fancy tricks that are going to make him love you if he doesn’t, value you if he doesn’t, or see you as someone he wants to spend the rest of his life with if that is not how he sees you. You cannot make a grown man do anything that he is not willing to do and therefore I will tell you to stop trying. There is someone who wants to love you, so why not focus on him instead of the ones who are not.
If you know a woman who is in a situation when she is trying to make a man love her then feel free to share this blog post with her.
As a mom of a teenage girl, this is so on point. It is something I’ve been working really hard to teach my daughter because it wasn’t taught to me, in fact, I was taught that all of my self-worth comes from my husband. It has been an uphill battle, but I’m finally learning to love myself without the approval of anyone else.
Well said. Thanks for your comment.
Why should this be a woman job, not, never, ain’t going to happen. Thought love was equal on both.
Again, another wonderful post that needs to be read by females of all ages. Great job!
It’s not a relationship worth being in if you have to force it to go anywhere. Neither person needs to be stuck doing that.
Healthy relationships are maintained when both partners put in equal effort and maintain excellent communication. Good relationships consist of mutual love, mutual admiration, deep friendship, trustworthiness, and respect.
wonderful post ! i am lucky hubby is so sweet and loving! i did learn the hard way through college though!
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Such an important lesson to learn. Too many girls wrap up everything in their relationships and then beat themselves up when it doesn’t go right… It’s a two way street, and he should be fighting for you just as much as you are fighting for him. If not, move on! You can do better.